Triple 5 Soul Gunner Long Jacket, $125, Urban Outfitters.

Just the other day, I was thinking, "I wonder where I can find something completely shapeless and unflattering that swooshes when I walk and makes me look like a reject from M.A.S.H.: The Musical- War Is an Ugly, Ugly Thang?"

Thank you, Urban Outfitters! I look no further.